检查英语作文（初中）【检查一下有没有语法错误】【另：告诉我一下哪句话不重要,这个作文太长了】（1）Teenagers t

检查英语作文（初中）
【检查一下有没有语法错误】
【另：告诉我一下哪句话不重要,这个作文太长了】
（1）
Teenagers today love food with a lot of fat ,oil, salt and sugar. The junk food make them be unhealthy .For example, too much salt might cause high blood pressure. They often feel tired and they often have something wrong with their body. I think following a healthy diet is one of the most important things for teenagers. They should eat food with less fat, oil, and they need to eat some fruits and vegetables every day. Because fruit and vegetables are rich in vitamins and have little fat. I hope all teenagers will be healthy.
第二篇：
（2）
The Olympic Game will be held in Beijing in august ,2008. Everyone in china is doing something for it, especially the people in Beijing have been the city volunteer. They pick up the trash, plant tyess,collect newspapers and glass bottles to recycle them. The families which have children organize car pools.This will make the traffic better and make the air cleaner.There are more and more people beginning to learn English because of the foreign visitors .We will clean-up the city parks, save water and electricity in the future. I hope the Olympic Game will be successful.
【长了点，本来可以出两个问题，但怕提类似的问题，又采纳同一个人的答案会被举报。因为明天要用，希望大家先帮忙回答一下，悬赏不够可以说，我会再加】

【第一篇】
语法错误并不多
1.把with改成full of.with在这里用感觉有点不舒服.
2.把第一行的be删去.make sb.+adj.
3.第二行的they指代不清.改成Teenagers吧.
4.第四行的for改成to.对于青少年来说.
我又帮你润色了一下.希望还合你胃口^ ^
Teenagers today love food full of a lot of fat ,oil,salt and sugar,which make them unhealthy.It is for that reason that they often feel tired and have something wrong with their bodies.
I think it is important for teenagers to follow a healthy diet.They should eat food containing less fat and oil.What's more,fruits and vegetables are rich in vitamins and less in fat.Thus,it is a good choice for teenagers to eat them every day.
I hope that all the teenagers will keep in good health.
【第二篇】
这篇还好.就直接帮你改咯.我是懒人= =
The Olympic Game will be held in Beijing in august ,2008.We Chinese are all busy doing something for it,especially the lucky city volunteers of Beijing.To recycle them,they pick up the litter,plant trees,collect old newspapers and glass bottles.The families with children organize car pools.By this way,the traffic will get better and the air will be cleaner.More and more people have been taking lessons to learn English to welcome foreign visitors.I'm looking forward to the success of the Olympic Game.
P.S.我要加分>0