请您帮助修改我的英文resume,将另附送感谢分

请您帮助修改我的英文resume,将另附送感谢分
ANDY LIU
456 Rose Ave Rosemead,CA 90120
(714) 345-6711
OBJECTIVE
To obtain a system administrator position in a company
EDUCATION
 Bachelor of Science,Electrical Engineering
Qingdao University of Technology,Wuhan,Qingdao,Degree June,2005.3.50/4.0 GPA
 Master of Science,Civil Engineering
California State University,Long Beach,US,Degree Dec,2011.3.60/4.0 GPA
RELATED COURSE WORK
 Harbor,Port,Waterway Design and Earthquake Engineering
 Green Building Systems and Data Mining Knowledge
 Plan and Control of Construction Project
 Construction Cost Estimating and Project Bidding Strategy
PROFESSIONAL EXPERIENCE
 2005-2007 Qingdao Port Corporation Limited Qingdao,China
Administrative Assistant
Responsible for office management,information systems,PC maintenance,and installation of software,coordinated actives related to listings,closings,and customer relations.Also assisted in construction design ,project management.
COMPUTER SKILLS
 Excellent skills in MS Word/Excel/PowerPoint/OneNote.
 Install,configure,upgrade,maintain Microsoft XP/VISTA/WIN7 operating system ,Mac OS,Linux,and build network between PCs.
 Familiar with MS Project and Oracle Primavera.
 Familiar with Matlab and Mathcad.
 Create basic database with MS Access.
 Design and build simple web pages.
SPECIAL SKILLS
Excellent communication skills in Chinese.
REFERENCES:
Furnished upon request.

没什么大错,但是有些地方你处理得不好
比如说,列出来的项目,必须是语法一致的,是名词,就都名词,不能用动词原型
RELATED COURSE WORK
 Harbor,Port,Waterway Design and Earthquake Engineering
 Green Building Systems and Data Mining Knowledge
 Plan and Control of Construction Project
 Construction Cost Estimating and Project Bidding Strategy
第三条的plan control就用的是动词,但是其他都是名词,最好改成名词,当然这两个词都有名词的意思,但是这里别人感觉就是都用了动词
这段Administrative Assistant
Responsible for office management,information systems,PC maintenance,and installation of software,coordinated actives related to listings,closings,and customer relations.Also assisted in construction design ,project management.
前面没什么问题,后面 Also assisted in construction design ,project management.就错了,这句话的意思是别人帮助你,因为你用的是assisted,别人认为这个被动态省略了主语和was,补上就是I was also assisted...所以你最好补全整个句子.如果这里补全主语了,那么你第一句responsible也要用完整的句子,不要就一个形容词开句,加个I was也可以.
COMPUTER SKILLS
 Excellent skills in MS Word/Excel/PowerPoint/OneNote.
 Install,configure,upgrade,maintain Microsoft XP/VISTA/WIN7 operating system ,Mac OS,Linux,and build network between PCs.
 Familiar with MS Project and Oracle Primavera.
 Familiar with Matlab and Mathcad.
 Create basic database with MS Access.
 Design and build simple web pages.
你这里明显写的是computer skills,那么后面列出来的,就应该是skill同级的单词,也就说应该是名词或者名词形式,除了第一条,其他都不是名词,familiar那两个还可以接受,至少不是动词,其他动词的都得改名词.
总的来说很不错啊,就是细节注意一下就好了,每一条都搭配好就没问题了