神马作文网求求求求懂雅思的好心的老师帮我细批一下这篇小作文 100分悬赏 加100分附加
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求求求求懂雅思的好心的老师帮我细批一下这篇小作文 100分悬赏 加100分附加
剑桥7的text1
The table illustrates the figure on how much consumer spend on different aspects in five separates countries in 2002.
The expenditure on food/drink/tobacco takes up 32.14% of total expenditure in turkey.But,while that makes up about 15.77%.As for the other four countries ,all of their figure between rough 30% to 15%.
9% of total expenditure is distributed into clothing/footwear in Italy .However,that occupay only 5.4% in Span.The figure for the rest three countries ,similarly,stand at around 6%.
Turkish spend 4.35% of their total expenditure on leisure/education ,which is followed by that of Sweden (3.22%) ,Italy(3.20%) and Ireland (2.21%).The figure for Span only represent 1.98%.
剑桥7的text1
The table illustrates the figure on how much consumer spend on different aspects in five separates countries in 2002.
The expenditure on food/drink/tobacco takes up 32.14% of total expenditure in turkey.But,while that makes up about 15.77%.As for the other four countries ,all of their figure between rough 30% to 15%.
9% of total expenditure is distributed into clothing/footwear in Italy .However,that occupay only 5.4% in Span.The figure for the rest three countries ,similarly,stand at around 6%.
Turkish spend 4.35% of their total expenditure on leisure/education ,which is followed by that of Sweden (3.22%) ,Italy(3.20%) and Ireland (2.21%).The figure for Span only represent 1.98%.
The table illustrates the figure on how much consumer spend on different aspects in five SEPARATED countries in 2002.
The expenditure on food/drink/tobacco takes up 32.14% of total (expenditure) in TURKEY. But,while that makes up about 15.77%. As for the other four countries ,all of their figure IS between rough 30% to 15%.
9% of total expenditure is distributed into clothing/footwear in Italy . However, that OCCUPIES only 5.4% in Span. The figure for the rest three countries ,similarly,STANDS at around 6%.
Turkish spend 4.35% of their total expenditure on leisure/education ,which is followed by that of Sweden (3.22%) , Italy(3.20%) and Ireland (2.21%). The figure for Span only REPRESENTS 1.98%
此文已拜读,总体不错,细节略有不足.大写之处已经改过,仅供参考!
再问： 亲 能不能点评一下我的作文
再答： 如果是仅仅对一个表格进行描述，也就可以了。只是我总感觉有点不完整，我个人觉得应该有你自己对该表格的观点，通过分析，表达出你的观点更好一些。
The expenditure on food/drink/tobacco takes up 32.14% of total (expenditure) in TURKEY. But,while that makes up about 15.77%. As for the other four countries ,all of their figure IS between rough 30% to 15%.
9% of total expenditure is distributed into clothing/footwear in Italy . However, that OCCUPIES only 5.4% in Span. The figure for the rest three countries ,similarly,STANDS at around 6%.
Turkish spend 4.35% of their total expenditure on leisure/education ,which is followed by that of Sweden (3.22%) , Italy(3.20%) and Ireland (2.21%). The figure for Span only REPRESENTS 1.98%
此文已拜读,总体不错,细节略有不足.大写之处已经改过,仅供参考!
再问： 亲 能不能点评一下我的作文
再答： 如果是仅仅对一个表格进行描述，也就可以了。只是我总感觉有点不完整，我个人觉得应该有你自己对该表格的观点，通过分析，表达出你的观点更好一些。
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