帮忙改下这篇英文作文如下Never give upLife doesn't always give us the joy
来源:学生作业帮 编辑:神马作文网作业帮 分类:英语作业 时间:2024/10/07 04:23:13
帮忙改下这篇英文作文
如下
Never give up
Life doesn't always give us the joys we want.Sometimes,we tried our best but still lost the competition.What should we do to deal with this problem?The best answer is never giving up.
Last year,in the midterm exam,I did badly in the Chinese exam,and all of my opponents were sure that I would have a low total score.But I didn’t give up.I believed if I did well in math and English exam,I would still have a high total score.So I faced the failure of Chinese exam head-on.Finally I did perfect well in another two exams,and won the second place in our class.
It’s normal to lose the competition.But the most important thing we need to do is to find the reason of the failure and not to give up.I think if we never give up,the road to success will be smoother.
如下
Never give up
Life doesn't always give us the joys we want.Sometimes,we tried our best but still lost the competition.What should we do to deal with this problem?The best answer is never giving up.
Last year,in the midterm exam,I did badly in the Chinese exam,and all of my opponents were sure that I would have a low total score.But I didn’t give up.I believed if I did well in math and English exam,I would still have a high total score.So I faced the failure of Chinese exam head-on.Finally I did perfect well in another two exams,and won the second place in our class.
It’s normal to lose the competition.But the most important thing we need to do is to find the reason of the failure and not to give up.I think if we never give up,the road to success will be smoother.
你作文写的挺好的 基本没错误 但是有的地方需要小改进一下
eg.
Finally ...perfect well...exams
--> Finally ...perfectly well...应该把形容词改为副词
It’s normal to lose the competition.
--> It's normal that we lose the competition sometimes.However,the most...这样改是觉得衔接会好点 仅供参考 你原来写的没有错误
还有就最后一句the road to success will be smoother 个人觉得逻辑不是很对 即使永不放弃也不代表着通往成功的路会变的更顺利 困难不会因为不放弃就不出现了 只能说你的坚持会使成功几率更大些
可以这样改...if we never give up,we will be more likely to achieve success in the years to come/ in the future.
另外,在最后可以进行一下升华,比如加一句名言“where there is a will,there is a way” 有志者事竟成 跟你的主题契合
eg.
Finally ...perfect well...exams
--> Finally ...perfectly well...应该把形容词改为副词
It’s normal to lose the competition.
--> It's normal that we lose the competition sometimes.However,the most...这样改是觉得衔接会好点 仅供参考 你原来写的没有错误
还有就最后一句the road to success will be smoother 个人觉得逻辑不是很对 即使永不放弃也不代表着通往成功的路会变的更顺利 困难不会因为不放弃就不出现了 只能说你的坚持会使成功几率更大些
可以这样改...if we never give up,we will be more likely to achieve success in the years to come/ in the future.
另外,在最后可以进行一下升华,比如加一句名言“where there is a will,there is a way” 有志者事竟成 跟你的主题契合
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