神马作文网求浅显易懂英文小笑话
来源：学生作业帮 编辑：神马作文网作业帮 分类：英语作业 时间：2024/11/12 01:32:43
求浅显易懂英文小笑话
A Big surprise
Visitor:Is this a healthy place to live in?
Local yokel:Yes,sir.When I arrived here,I couldn't walk or eat solid food.
Visitor:What was the matter with you?
Local yokel:Nothing---I was born here.
游客：住在这样一个地方是不是有益于健康?
乡下佬：是的,先生.我刚到这时,我既不会走路也不能吃硬的东西.
游客：你怎么了?
乡下佬：没什么——我就出生在这个地方.
A girl’s wish
On the way home after watching a ballet performance,the kindergarten teacher asked her students what they thought of it.The smallest girl in the class said she wished the dancers were taller so that they would not have to stand on their toes all the time.
在观看完芭蕾舞表演回家的路上,幼儿园老师问学生的观后感.班上最小的女孩说,她希望舞蹈演员可以长得更高一点儿,那么他们就不用整天踮着脚尖了.
A Jealous wife
There was once a wife so jealous that when her husband came home one night and she couldn’t find hairs on his jackets she yelled at him,Great,so now you’re cheating on me with a bald woman!
The next night,when she didn’t smell any perfume,she yelled again by saying,She’s not only bald,but she’s too cheap to buy any perfume!
从前有个妻子醋劲很大.一天晚上丈夫回家,她没有从他衣服上找到头发,于是大叫：好啊,现在你开始和秃头的女人骗我了!
第二天晚上,她没有从丈夫衣服上闻到香水味,于是又大叫：她不但是个秃头,而且很穷酸,连香水都不买.
A careless barber
Barber:Were you wearing a red scarf when you came in?
Customer:No.
Barber:Oh,then I must have cut your throat.
理发员：你进来时是不是系着红围巾?
顾客：没有呀.
理发员：噢,那我肯定弄破了你的喉咙.
A mystery letter
I don't like to inquire（询问,查究） too curiously into your affairs,said the lady to her husband.But something's been bothering me for days.So?said the husband,Tell me all about it.
You got a letter last Friday,the lady said.It was perfumed.It was in a girl's handwriting.I saw you oped it,you broke into a sweat.You turned white.Your hands trembled…For goodness'sake,who was it from and what did it say?
Oh,that,said the husband.I decided it was best for both of us not to talk about it at the time.
For heaven's sake,screamed the woman.Tell me who it was from and what it said.
Okay,said the husband.It was from your dress shop.It said you owe them $740.
我不想过分好奇地打听你的事情,妻子对她的丈夫说,但是有件事已经困扰我好几天了.
是吗?丈夫说,你说给我听听.
上星期五你收到了一封信,妻子说.信是洒了香水的,是女孩的字迹.我见你打开信：你突然冒出一身冷汗,你的脸变得煞白,你的手颤抖着……天哪,是谁写的信?信上都说了些什么?
噢,是这事儿,丈夫说,我当时决定我们俩最好不要谈论它.
天哪!那女人尖叫起来,告诉我谁写的,都写了些什么.
好吧,丈夫说,是从你的服装店寄来的,说你欠他们七百四十美元.
Luck mother
A young mother believed that it was very wrong to waste any food when there were so many hungry people in the world.One evening,she was giving her small daughterher tea before putting her to bed.First she gave her a slice of fresh brown bread and butter,but the child said that she did not want it like that.She asked for some jam on her bread as well.
Her mother looked at her for a few seconds and then said,When I was a small girl like you,Lucy,I was always given either bread and butter,or bread and jam,but never bread with butter and jam.
Lucy looked at her mother for a few moments with pity in her eyes and then said to her kindly,Aren't you pleased that you've come to live with us now?
一位年轻的母亲认为,世界上还有许多受饥饿的人,浪费食物真不应该.有天晚上,在安排幼小的女儿睡觉之前,她给女儿喂夜宵.她先给她一片新鲜的黑面包和黄油,但孩子说她不喜欢这样吃.她还要一些果酱涂在面包上.
母亲看了女儿几秒钟,随即说道,露茜,当我象你一样小的时候,总是吃面包加黄油,或者面包加果酱,从来没有面包既加黄油又加果酱.
露茜看了母亲一会儿,眼中露出怜悯的神情,然后她柔声说：您现在能跟我们生活在一起难道不感到高兴吗?
Visitor:Is this a healthy place to live in?
Local yokel:Yes,sir.When I arrived here,I couldn't walk or eat solid food.
Visitor:What was the matter with you?
Local yokel:Nothing---I was born here.
游客：住在这样一个地方是不是有益于健康?
乡下佬：是的,先生.我刚到这时,我既不会走路也不能吃硬的东西.
游客：你怎么了?
乡下佬：没什么——我就出生在这个地方.
A girl’s wish
On the way home after watching a ballet performance,the kindergarten teacher asked her students what they thought of it.The smallest girl in the class said she wished the dancers were taller so that they would not have to stand on their toes all the time.
在观看完芭蕾舞表演回家的路上,幼儿园老师问学生的观后感.班上最小的女孩说,她希望舞蹈演员可以长得更高一点儿,那么他们就不用整天踮着脚尖了.
A Jealous wife
There was once a wife so jealous that when her husband came home one night and she couldn’t find hairs on his jackets she yelled at him,Great,so now you’re cheating on me with a bald woman!
The next night,when she didn’t smell any perfume,she yelled again by saying,She’s not only bald,but she’s too cheap to buy any perfume!
从前有个妻子醋劲很大.一天晚上丈夫回家,她没有从他衣服上找到头发,于是大叫：好啊,现在你开始和秃头的女人骗我了!
第二天晚上,她没有从丈夫衣服上闻到香水味,于是又大叫：她不但是个秃头,而且很穷酸,连香水都不买.
A careless barber
Barber:Were you wearing a red scarf when you came in?
Customer:No.
Barber:Oh,then I must have cut your throat.
理发员：你进来时是不是系着红围巾?
顾客：没有呀.
理发员：噢,那我肯定弄破了你的喉咙.
A mystery letter
I don't like to inquire（询问,查究） too curiously into your affairs,said the lady to her husband.But something's been bothering me for days.So?said the husband,Tell me all about it.
You got a letter last Friday,the lady said.It was perfumed.It was in a girl's handwriting.I saw you oped it,you broke into a sweat.You turned white.Your hands trembled…For goodness'sake,who was it from and what did it say?
Oh,that,said the husband.I decided it was best for both of us not to talk about it at the time.
For heaven's sake,screamed the woman.Tell me who it was from and what it said.
Okay,said the husband.It was from your dress shop.It said you owe them $740.
我不想过分好奇地打听你的事情,妻子对她的丈夫说,但是有件事已经困扰我好几天了.
是吗?丈夫说,你说给我听听.
上星期五你收到了一封信,妻子说.信是洒了香水的,是女孩的字迹.我见你打开信：你突然冒出一身冷汗,你的脸变得煞白,你的手颤抖着……天哪,是谁写的信?信上都说了些什么?
噢,是这事儿,丈夫说,我当时决定我们俩最好不要谈论它.
天哪!那女人尖叫起来,告诉我谁写的,都写了些什么.
好吧,丈夫说,是从你的服装店寄来的,说你欠他们七百四十美元.
Luck mother
A young mother believed that it was very wrong to waste any food when there were so many hungry people in the world.One evening,she was giving her small daughterher tea before putting her to bed.First she gave her a slice of fresh brown bread and butter,but the child said that she did not want it like that.She asked for some jam on her bread as well.
Her mother looked at her for a few seconds and then said,When I was a small girl like you,Lucy,I was always given either bread and butter,or bread and jam,but never bread with butter and jam.
Lucy looked at her mother for a few moments with pity in her eyes and then said to her kindly,Aren't you pleased that you've come to live with us now?
一位年轻的母亲认为,世界上还有许多受饥饿的人,浪费食物真不应该.有天晚上,在安排幼小的女儿睡觉之前,她给女儿喂夜宵.她先给她一片新鲜的黑面包和黄油,但孩子说她不喜欢这样吃.她还要一些果酱涂在面包上.
母亲看了女儿几秒钟,随即说道,露茜,当我象你一样小的时候,总是吃面包加黄油,或者面包加果酱,从来没有面包既加黄油又加果酱.
露茜看了母亲一会儿,眼中露出怜悯的神情,然后她柔声说：您现在能跟我们生活在一起难道不感到高兴吗?