英语翻译原歌词如下.I live on burgers,Cheetos,and ice creamGot nothing

英语翻译
原歌词如下.
I live on burgers,Cheetos,and ice cream
Got nothing but lard in my blood stream
Guess my sweet tooth was something more than a phase
Been fueling up on cupcakes and Twinkies
Gained so much weight my girl left me
She said to call her if I ever change my ways
I put the pizza away
Went on a diet today
I can't wait till I get thin then I'll show her
I put the pizza away
I'm gonna lose some weight
I can't wait till I get thin then I'll show her
I missed you last night at the hotel
I even missed your bacon and beer smell
Then it finally dawned on me how to make things right
I pulled up to a fast food venue
Ordered everything on the menu
Time to go back home and stuff my face
Picked up a pizza today
I'm gonna power binge
I'm gonna eat till nothing's left in the fridge
I'm gonna hit the buffet
I'm gonna gain some weight
I can't wait till I get fat then I'll show him
Been hitting Ben and Jerry's for breakfast
You know I finally got the hang of this Slim Fast
Since you've been gone
I've been gaining/losing so much weight
I've been jogging instead of taking the car
I've been eating mayonaise straight from the jar
I was making dessert
I was off to lift some weights
Now I'm liking what I see on the scale
So I sent a picture out in the mail
Oh hey look you sent one too
Let's just..whoa,hey wait / OMG!
I saw your picture today
I see you've changed your ways
You know I think I liked you better the way you were
I saw your picture today
I see you lost/gained some weight
I just called to say don't bother to come back home
I just called to say don't bother to come back home
麻烦在线翻译过来的文理不通的就表进了。冷汗ING。
为什么为什么为什么没有人看。莫非我真的就是传说中的帖子杀手？

尽力精确了.中文不佳,缺乏诗意,不好意思.多给点分吧.
I live on burgers,Cheetos,and ice cream 我天天吃汉堡包,奇多和冰激凌
Got nothing but lard in my blood stream 我的血液里只有猪油
Guess my sweet tooth was something more than a phase 我想我喜欢吃甜食不是一天两天的事了
Been fueling up on cupcakes and Twinkies 被纸杯蛋糕和奶油蛋糕条塞饱了肚子
Gained so much weight my girl left me 胖得连我的女友都不要我
She said to call her if I ever change my ways 她说如果我改变生活方式才可以打电话给她
I put the pizza away 我扔掉比萨
Went on a diet today 今天开始减肥
I can't wait till I get thin then I'll show her 我等不及要瘦下来,我要证明给她看
I put the pizza away 我扔掉比萨
I'm gonna lose some weight 我的体重开始减轻
I can't wait till I get thin then I'll show her 我等不及要瘦下来,我要证明给她看
I missed you last night at the hotel 我昨晚在酒店里想着你
I even missed your bacon and beer smell 我甚至怀念你身上的熏肉、啤酒味
Then it finally dawned on me how to make things right 我终于明白怎样让生活正常
I pulled up to a fast food venue 我将车停在快餐店
Ordered everything on the menu 点了菜单上的每一样东西
Time to go back home and stuff my face 是时候回家并填满肚子
Picked up a pizza today 今天买了一个比萨
I'm gonna power binge 我要使劲大吃大喝
I'm gonna eat till nothing's left in the fridge 我要消灭冰箱中的一切
I'm gonna hit the buffet 我要去吃自助餐
I'm gonna gain some weight 我要长胖
I can't wait till I get fat then I'll show him 我等不及要瘦下来,我要证明给他看
Been hitting Ben and Jerry's for breakfast 去了Ben 和Jerry家吃早饭
You know I finally got the hang of this Slim Fast 你知道我不再吃速效减肥药
Since you've been gone 自从你走后
I've been gaining/losing so much weight 我胖/瘦了这么多
I've been jogging instead of taking the car 我开始慢跑,不再开车
I've been eating mayonaise straight from the jar 我直接从罐子中挖美乃滋吃
I was making dessert 我开始做甜点
I was off to lift some weights 我开始长胖
Now I'm liking what I see on the scale 我喜欢磅秤上我的体重
So I sent a picture out in the mail 所以我寄了张照片给你
Oh hey look you sent one too 瞧,你也寄了张照片给我
Let's just..whoa,hey wait / OMG!就让我们...哇,等等/ 我的天哪（oh,my god）
I saw your picture today 我看到你的照片了
I see you've changed your ways 我看到你改了你的生活方式
You know I think I liked you better the way you were 你知道我更喜欢这样的你
I saw your picture today 我看到你的照片了
I see you lost/gained some weight 我看到你也胖/瘦了
I just called to say don't bother to come back home 我只是想打电话告诉你你不必回家
I just called to say don't bother to come back home 我只是想打电话告诉你你不必回家