请帮忙修改一篇英语作文
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请帮忙修改一篇英语作文
Lovely people .I will thank you
It was 2:30 on May 12th 2008 when the earth begon to shake .The people in Sichuan were frightened .Some of the people escaped from the dangerous
places.but most of the people didn't run out .they were buried in the ruins.some were injured seriously and some were dead .It seemed as if the world
was at an end . However , the soldiers came immediately .they brought hope to survivors. they rescued the people
who were trapped .They gave their own foods and warter to survivors.also .they rescued people without
thinking about themselves .they were so great that I was moved by them .So.I would like to express my thanks to the soldiers.the lovely people.
Not long front that .the president Hu Jintao came. he told the people who were buried in runs to
hold on and the soldier would save them right away.He encouraged inspired the people and made them calm down to face the reality .He gave confidence to the survious to live. So no words are strong enough
to express our thanks to the president Hu our lovely ieader.
I'd also like to thank the workers who world hard to build a new city .After the earthquake .everything
wes damaged,the city was in ruins.S the workers came there to put the buildings in order .They make the
city recovered lively. It is them that I really want to thanka for the lovely people.
There are so many lovely people .who were the most great and the loveliest .They gave out themselves
to the people ,to the city to the whole country .without any complain.They tried their best to help the people
people.to save the people .So,it's necessary to thank them.our lovely people .
At last .I will also thank you ,the good listeners.
All of you and them are the lovely people .and I will thank you by my heart ,really thank you.
Lovely people .I will thank you
It was 2:30 on May 12th 2008 when the earth begon to shake .The people in Sichuan were frightened .Some of the people escaped from the dangerous
places.but most of the people didn't run out .they were buried in the ruins.some were injured seriously and some were dead .It seemed as if the world
was at an end . However , the soldiers came immediately .they brought hope to survivors. they rescued the people
who were trapped .They gave their own foods and warter to survivors.also .they rescued people without
thinking about themselves .they were so great that I was moved by them .So.I would like to express my thanks to the soldiers.the lovely people.
Not long front that .the president Hu Jintao came. he told the people who were buried in runs to
hold on and the soldier would save them right away.He encouraged inspired the people and made them calm down to face the reality .He gave confidence to the survious to live. So no words are strong enough
to express our thanks to the president Hu our lovely ieader.
I'd also like to thank the workers who world hard to build a new city .After the earthquake .everything
wes damaged,the city was in ruins.S the workers came there to put the buildings in order .They make the
city recovered lively. It is them that I really want to thanka for the lovely people.
There are so many lovely people .who were the most great and the loveliest .They gave out themselves
to the people ,to the city to the whole country .without any complain.They tried their best to help the people
people.to save the people .So,it's necessary to thank them.our lovely people .
At last .I will also thank you ,the good listeners.
All of you and them are the lovely people .and I will thank you by my heart ,really thank you.
It was (这里应加个the,表示特指)2:30 on May 12th 2008 when the earth begon(应该用began) to shake .The people in Sichuan were frightened .Some of the people(前面已对the people做了介绍,这里应用them替代the people) escaped from the dangerous
places.but(in the meantime表示同时的意思,可替换but) most of the people(them代替the people) didn't(此处用failed to代替didn't) run out .they were buried in the(此处不需特指,可去掉the) ruins.some were injured seriously and some(此处用others 代替some) were dead .It seemed as if the world
was at(此处用had come to代替was at) an end .However(用fortunately代替however) ,the(去掉the) soldiers came immediately .they brought hope to survivors.they rescued the people
who were trapped(此处用sieged代替trapped) .They gave their own foods and warter(单词错误,应是water) to survivors.also(用also的话,位置应提到gave之前,在此位置可用as well结尾) .they rescued people without
thinking about themselves .they were so great that I was moved by them(这里可以把by them去掉,因为前面已经说的很清楚了) .So.I would like to express my thanks to the soldiers(用them 代替the soldiers).the lovely people.
Not long front(这里应是from) that .the president Hu Jintao(应是Jintao Hu) came.he told the people who were buried in runs(ruins) to
hold on and the soldier(soldiers代替the soldier) would save them right away.He encouraged inspired the people and made them calm down to face the reality (这句话改成:He inspired the people to calm down,and to face the reality bravely).He gave confidence to the survious to live(加个on).So no words are strong enough
to express our thanks to the president Hu our lovely ieader(leader).
I'd also like to thank the workers who world(worked) hard to build a new city .After the earthquake .everything
wes(was) damaged,the city was in ruins.S(So) the workers came there to put the buildings in order .They make(made) the
city recovered lively.It is them that I really want to thanka(thank) for the lovely people.
There are so many lovely people .who were the most great(greatest代替the most great) and the loveliest .They gave out themselves(concentrated all their energy on giving unselfish help代替gave out themselves)
to the people ,to the city to the whole country .without any complain.They tried their best to help the(去掉the) people
people.(去掉此people)(加个and) to save the(去掉the) people .So,it's necessary to thank them.our lovely people .
At last .I will also thank you who act as good listeners.
(加个both) All of(去掉all of) you and them are the(去掉the) lovely people .and I will(去掉will) thank you by my heart(thank you by my heart改成thank you from the bottom of my heart) ,really thank you(去掉thank you,只要really).
places.but(in the meantime表示同时的意思,可替换but) most of the people(them代替the people) didn't(此处用failed to代替didn't) run out .they were buried in the(此处不需特指,可去掉the) ruins.some were injured seriously and some(此处用others 代替some) were dead .It seemed as if the world
was at(此处用had come to代替was at) an end .However(用fortunately代替however) ,the(去掉the) soldiers came immediately .they brought hope to survivors.they rescued the people
who were trapped(此处用sieged代替trapped) .They gave their own foods and warter(单词错误,应是water) to survivors.also(用also的话,位置应提到gave之前,在此位置可用as well结尾) .they rescued people without
thinking about themselves .they were so great that I was moved by them(这里可以把by them去掉,因为前面已经说的很清楚了) .So.I would like to express my thanks to the soldiers(用them 代替the soldiers).the lovely people.
Not long front(这里应是from) that .the president Hu Jintao(应是Jintao Hu) came.he told the people who were buried in runs(ruins) to
hold on and the soldier(soldiers代替the soldier) would save them right away.He encouraged inspired the people and made them calm down to face the reality (这句话改成:He inspired the people to calm down,and to face the reality bravely).He gave confidence to the survious to live(加个on).So no words are strong enough
to express our thanks to the president Hu our lovely ieader(leader).
I'd also like to thank the workers who world(worked) hard to build a new city .After the earthquake .everything
wes(was) damaged,the city was in ruins.S(So) the workers came there to put the buildings in order .They make(made) the
city recovered lively.It is them that I really want to thanka(thank) for the lovely people.
There are so many lovely people .who were the most great(greatest代替the most great) and the loveliest .They gave out themselves(concentrated all their energy on giving unselfish help代替gave out themselves)
to the people ,to the city to the whole country .without any complain.They tried their best to help the(去掉the) people
people.(去掉此people)(加个and) to save the(去掉the) people .So,it's necessary to thank them.our lovely people .
At last .I will also thank you who act as good listeners.
(加个both) All of(去掉all of) you and them are the(去掉the) lovely people .and I will(去掉will) thank you by my heart(thank you by my heart改成thank you from the bottom of my heart) ,really thank you(去掉thank you,只要really).